Tender Touch and Care

There are so many different forms of touch that each insinuate entirely different things. There are so many types of relationships we have not just with people but with animals and objects and the earth. These relationships each serve different emotional purposes and some may hold more value to us than others. Constance Classen's "The Deepest Sense: A Cultural History of Touch" goes in-depth on the evolution of touch in our society. Classen began with creation and how touch was considered a lower sense associated with feminity. Touch then evolved into a necessity that connected people socially and then finally to something that was not necessary because we as humans were becoming more autonomous after the middle ages. Throughout the book, Classen discusses different forms of touch and their value to society and individuals over time.

Touch, as Classen mentioned, evolved into a way of greeting as well as a way to express intimacy between loved ones. This intimacy also comes in different forms. There is sexual intimacy as well as platonic intimacy between family and friends. This kind of intimate touch is usually built up to with trust. In our society, sexual intimacy with others usually requires a certain level of trust because when we are physically naked we are vulnerable. Even more so when touch is used in the form of platonic intimacy we're being emotionally vulnerable with others and allowing them to care for and comfort us. This support can also come from other places like emotional support animals or comfort objects such as stuffed animals and security blankets. Just the touch of these people, animals, and things provide us with security that we're not alone and that we're protected in some way or another.

As a child, I slept with a beanie baby dog with a heart around one of his eyes and I named him Puppy Dog (original I know). He made me feel safe just by the feeling and weight of him as I slept even the smell. While Puppy Dog was not alive the touch and comfort he provided me for years made me feel like he was real and watching over me. I used to try to sneak in my room and see if I could catch him moving because that's how sure I was that he was real and taking care of me.

Touch is something I find necessary to feel connected to others in an intimate way. Since I have been home every time I see my parents I go up to them and lean towards them so they can give me a kiss on the cheek. This is something I used to do to my close friends at Wheaton as well. Hugs and kisses and affirming touch make me feel safe and cared for. Just like with Puppy Dog, when my loved ones hold me close or squeeze my hand I know that they care for me and love me without saying a word. To me, touch is an action that speaks way louder than words.