Taste/Religion in the Kitchen Post: Shake & Bake

     It's a tale as old as time, woman cook good and man eat. This is how it's depicted in TV, movies and other forms of media. But as a child I was convinced it was the other way around, my mother was a horrible cook. She often admitted it when I was little, after her and my dad separated I did realize a lot of our food was from a bag or box. The only thing my mom often made "from scratch" required a shake and bake box of breading which now my stepfather deems as not truly from scratch. All of the good scratch food I had was from my Dad, he was Italian and Texan which he believes it the best food worlds. He would make stews, pasta, and lots of forms of meat. So whenever I heard of this women are good cooks my brain kind of rejected it. My grandmother tried really hard to reinforce this saying "it just skipped a generation Charlotte, our women are good cooks." Now I find this hard to believe that the women in my family are great cooks when the one telling me is 83 and refuses to eat anything that isn't leftovers or prepared meals. But one thing that always struck me as odd was the conversations my Grandmother and Mom have about cooking, she would often ask my mom how my stepdad feels not having a meal to come home to. I learned later that my grandmothers second husband every morning would ask what would be for dinner, this baffled me because she was a nurse! During class I really thought about the fact how men control a lot of ritual and religious practices and how the act of cooking is a female thing and that the interesting ritual aspect is male. My grandfather was in charge of the house and part of the control was knowing what meal he would come home to, he didn't know how it would be made or the recipe he would just know it was there.

    Perez talks a lot about how women are at the center of religious ritual because they are the ones who prep the food for the people but they aren't seen as important, not as much as the men who solidify the ritual. But the women had the knowledge which was super important because they knew how to do what they did correctly. They weren't reading the back of a box In a household the woman cooking the food isn't seen as the person who is in control of the house, it's the man because he asks at 5am what dinner will be. But this relies a lot on a family having two parental or adult units, in a situation like mine I had my Mom as a custodial parent, there was no force for a while asking what dinner was besides me. But I knew I had no control, if I did we would've ordered out a lot more. But dinner was a ritual for me especially on nights we'd share meals with my friends who often were also single parent house holds. They were chat in the kitchen while me and my friend watched TV and often went into the kitchen to see what was being made. In my experience the women were the ones in charge even if they couldn't cook. I didn't encounter actually seasoning until my dad had a place and could cook more often, my moms spice rack was salt and pepper next to a bunch of sprinkles and my baking supplies. But she always made due, even know she isn't the one who is asked what dinner is, that is my stepfathers role is. But most of the time one decides they are gonna come home late and then lets the other two knew to cook something without them. There is no control of waiting till he or she gets home.